FINNED: Meet the Normals--Meikle Martinez, Witch

Today, lovely readers, we meet our first Normal. Meikle Martinez is known for being very dark, unemotional, and quite intimidating. Try not to hide behind your coral couches, readers! Here we go…

Hi Meikle! I’m Clarissa Smoggrove, chief reporter for the #1 selling merperson magazine, Sandierays. Thank you for taking time to answer some burning questions for our curious readers!

Meikle [swinging her illustrious purple sequined bag]: We’ll see if you still thank me by the time we’re done.

Uh, right. [wipes brow]

Meikle: What is that thing? Looks like some sort of elongated hourglass that spits out…sandpaper?

Oh, it’s a Sandblastwriter. It transcribes everything we say—even my mental notes—and automatically sends it to my editor, so she can read it in real-time. She can even send her suggestions or questions. See this slot on the right side? If she wants to insert thoughts, small blue clouds will puff from there, transform into lips, and ask you questions. Don’t let it frighten you.

Meikle: Nothing frightens me.

Yes, well, shall we begin?

Meikle: Thought we already had.

[nervous laughter] So, when did you first realize you were different from other children?

Meikle: I was five. This little jerk named Tommy McMathers shoved me into a hornet’s nest behind the school playground. I turned the hornets into dragonflies…which mysteriously attached themselves to Tommy’s head and face. One even went up his hairy nostril. Did I mention he was deathly afraid of dragonflies?

Uh, no, you didn’t mention that. How did Tommy react?

Meikle: Oh, he screamed like a little girl. It was great.

Is that how the Imperia found out about you?

Meikle: Doubt it. Tommy was too afraid of me to tattle. Besides, according to Trey, the Imperia has some kind of early warning system. Basically, anyone who’s different is institution-bound.

Life in the institution must have been awful. Would you like to talk a little about your experience there?

Meikle: No.

Oh. Um. Maybe just a brief statement of your experience for our readers?

Meikle: Sucked.

Well…

Meikle: You did say ‘brief.’

I did, didn’t I? All right, then…can you tell us a little more about Madame Helena Hambourg? She’s the founder and principal of The Helena Hambourg House for Maladies, but she also heads up The Hoodoo Council, is that right?

Meikle [glaring murderously at the Sandblastwriter as a puff of blue smoke emerges and begins floating around her head]: Yep, she’s the head hag of both. Helena’s House of Hell was the first institution created for our kind. It filled to capacity pretty quickly as more and more kids emerged with unexplainable gifts. I think our government thought it was an anomaly at first—just a weird transmutation in a containable group that would go away with treatment. When our kind grew exponentially, the government crapped a brick house and opened lots of institutions. The Hoodoo Council oversees them all. What does this annoying thing want? It’s pissing me off. [gestures editor’s floating blue puff]

My editor would like to ask a question.

Meikle [tightly gripping her bag]: Then stop circling my head and ask the damn question.

Editor, in the form of blue puff lips: Does The Hoodoo Council hear every Normal transgression, or is there another deciding body?

Meikle [shaking head]: Didn’t I just basically answer that?! Your editor needs to be timelier in her inquisition. Uh, yeah, they preside over every Normal in every institution. Everything goes through them.

Helena Hambourg’s a pretty big deal in the movement against your kind, then.

Meikle: Ya think?

But she possesses powers as well and, I understand, uses them. Is that not a bit hypocritical on her part and that of your government?

Meikle [one corner of her mouth curling into the slightest of grins]: The world is full hypocrites and contradictions. But…one day, it will happen. One damn day…

What will happen one day?

Meikle: Tables will turn…and I’ll be doing the turning.

What are three words that best describe Madame Helena?

Meikle [grinning]: None are safe for your publication.

Next week: Meikle talks about being a witch!

NOTE: Once again, there are big gaps between paragraphs. NO CLUE how to fix it; they don't show at all in the preview or in the 'compose post' screen. :/ I'm so sorry about that. :/ Maybe it's how Meikle wants it to look, who knows?! lol 

OVERFALLS, The Merworld Water Wars Book Two Cover!

 I didn’t think it was possible to love a book cover as much as I love the one for FINNED…then I saw the one for my second baby, OVERFALLS. 

*THUD* 

Yeah, that would be me falling off the chair. I’m so completely and totally IN LOVE with this cover! Not only does it speak to a VERY important part of the story, but the way the clouds circle Marina…it’s like she’s in the eye of a particularly nasty storm (which, well…yeah, I’ll shut up now). 

Sigh. I want to hug it.

 

So, without further ado…please meet OVERFALLS, the second wave in The Merworld Water Wars series: 

Cover Art: Claudia McKinney at Phatpuppy Art ~<3~ Typography: Ashley, The Bookish Brunette

Two secret wishes. Only one will be granted. Let the Mer-Nor Games begin.

Unlike most high school seniors, Marina Valentine isn’t sweating college (she’s outlawed from even applying), the prom (she has her dream date…possibly), or graduation (though surviving to rock the ill-fitting gown is iffy). No, she’s a little preoccupied with succeeding as a walking myth post-graduation. So, when Marina awakens as the one and only Siren Savior, she thinks the tide is about to turn on the merbitch’s mer-psycho family. Unfortunately, she has issues with her flighty Savior powers, and the timing couldn’t be worse. For with the arrival of a feared foe, comes the promise of a disastrous year…and that’s an understatement.

For years, mythological beings have awaited the fulfillment of a mysterious prophecy involving Merpeople, Normals, an epic clash, and a wish that could forever change one group’s destiny. But the real trouble begins when an assassin known as The Dealer starts sending her cryptic messages written on potentially lethal playing cards.

The Dealer makes one thing very clear: someone Marina loves will die. Now, she must find The Dealer before he (or she) finds his victim. But with everyone either a suspect or a target, how will Marina be able to uncover the truth before time runs out?

Not even the Siren Savior in all her power can prepare for the devastating answers.

Roping the Roundup, Part Two: Cover Reveal, Reviews, & Upcoming Character Interviews

It seems when I remember to post things on FB or Twitter, I forget to add them here and vice versa. *shakes head*

Roundup: 

*Cover Reveal: Ooooh, it's here! It's here! It's time! The cover for my second baby is all ready! I'll be doing a thorough post and summary on here tomorrow. If you'd like to see it sooner, please stop by The Zombie Queen herself: 

The Bookish Brunette-The Merworld Water Wars Book Two  Cover Reveal! 

* Reviews: FINNED has received a couple of truly AMAZING editorial reviews from Ashley at The Bookish Brunette and PaulHarrison of A Role Model. I reverted back to my seven-year-old self when I read them, and Mom and I actually jumped up and down and cried (did I really just admit to that?).

Here are a couple of snippets from each (**SQUEAL**). The links to the full reviews can be found in the above paragraph (done especially for you, Mom; now you can just click the link, since I know how much you hate to type in web addresses ;) ) 

 "Two words: Freaking Awesome...FINNED is a fun, sharp-witted tale of Merpeople, Normals, first love, some heart-pounding action and a centuries old war that everyone is still fighting. And MerRacing?? Oh. My. God. BEST THING EVER!!! Seriously- one of the coolest freaking scenes I've ever read in my life..." -The Bookish Brunette

"...FINNED is fun and witty. It's so packed full of charm that it is simply irresistible. The book is fun from start to finish. It's entertaining in a way that very few indie books are, and for that its more than worthy of recommendation." -Paul Harrison, ARoleModel

* Mandy's Top Ten: I also recently answered Mandy’s Top Ten on her blog, I read Indie.  Her questions, like her blog, were an absolute blast! The giveaway is over now (and stupid me didn't remember to post about it here--just FB and twitter. Hey, at least I got 2 out of 3). If you’d like to read her awesomeness and my silliness, as well as an excerpt from FINNED, pop on over by clicking this link: 

Top Ten with silly me! 

* Character Interviews: Well, the Merpeople have finally secured interviews with the local Normals (i.e. Non-merfolk, but powerful nonetheless…albeit extremely quirky). Please join chief reporter from the top selling merfolk publication, Sandierays, Clarissa Smoggrove as she attempts to dig up dirt on the resident outcasts of Saxet Shores, Texas (operative word being ‘attempts’).

Let’s just say these interviews could get very, very messy.

First up on Ms. Smoggrove’s radar is Meikle Martinez, a powerful witch with a dark, somewhat unemotional demeanor. Well-known for her mysterious obsession with her purple sequined bag (rumored to hold some unknown power), Meikle is a self-proclaimed non-hugger, prefers black to all colors, & shows unwavering loyalty to her friends.

Coming soon! :)

NOTE: I'm so sorry for all the big spaces. It doesn't look that way in the edit/create post page. I have no idea how to fix it. :/

Roping the Roundup, Part One

Clearly, I need to improve the whole blogging/Facebook/twitter thing. This is nothing new. Eventually I figure the power of super savvy will kick in and transform me into a social media guru (and this would be the definition of delusional…or wishful thinking…think I prefer the latter, yet realize the former is more accurate).

Roundup time (I chose 'roundup' over 'update' because it fits better with my Texas roots...and reminds me of cowboys):

* My parents: It’s been a twisty road up a steep hill with rough terrain, but my parents are doing better. I still worry about them…don’t think I’ll ever stop worrying. It’s a wonder I don’t manufacture worry.

* Cover for Book Two (Wave Two): The book cover for Wave Two is ready!!! SO exciting!!! It’s absolutely beautiful! I’m so, so, so in love with it!!! Seriously, who needs a man when you can fall in love with a book cover, right?! (Um, ignore that one. What can I say? It’s my way of comforting my perpetually confused, single gal heart)

I can’t wait to share the cover with anyone out there who might be reading. I hope you’re out there somewhere. Hellooooooo out there. Ooh, I hear an echo. That can’t be good. :/

* Progress on Book Two: I honestly thought I’d have the second book published by now. Everything was cruising along SO smoothly and quickly that I just figured…well, wrong, apparently. :/ Between my OCD’ing and fruitless attempts at perfection, time tends to slip by me. Then there’s the little problem with my emotional involvement with my characters and their story—sometimes, I’ll just cry through scenes and end up with a headache and blurry vision. I know I’m ridiculous!!! Still, progress is moving at a steady pace and I anticipate releasing this summer (aiming for June or sooner).

And then there’s this…

* Think there’s a very good chance I was a hermit crab in my past life: Okay, Mom laughed to the point of snorts when I mentioned this random brainwave, but check out the evidence:

Exhibit #1: Social Media Shy (Seriously, who's shy when sitting behind a computer?! I’m working on it. Literally. I’ve been researching my eyes out, trying to familiarize myself with everything and figure out a way to be less silly).

Exhibit #2: When using social media, I instantly take the Dolorean back to junior high school and once again enter the Island of Misfit Toys.

Exhibit #3: Birds, especially seagulls (creepy, right?!), have an unusual fondness for me, which is sort of disturbing ever since I saw The Birds.

Part Two of the roundup to come…

Elevator Eliminator

WOW. Okay, so I've been M.I.A. for a while, huh? It's been a pretty intense holiday season. My family has been going through so much lately. Some days, I've actually wondered if we didn't accidentally step into some alternate reality...but it just turns out we ran right through a big 'ole pile of BLEEP.  Life, right? Stay strong, have faith. That's what we do...well, I may add some crying...and worrying...and panicking...and all the good stuff that falls under the anxiety umbrella. Always an adventure when you combine worrywart and an emotional waterfall. 

Anyway, Book Two is underway!!! My characters are making me laugh HYSTERICALLY (yeah, I know that sounds slightly insane, but I guarantee anybody who has written anything with characters and dialogue will totally get it...I hope). I see every facial twitch, hear every elevation in their voices...they're REAL to me. I just love them so much! And, again, I illustrate my dorkdom. Sigh. 

I got to thinking about elevators the other day. No idea why. So, here's a little blip about elevators...and me: 


Confession: I like elevator music. There, I said it. There’s just one tiny catch…I hate elevators. Scare. The. Ever-loving. Snot. Out. Of. Me. No joke. Of course, this is probably because my trouble-causing dad chose a glass-enclosed elevator facing the outside of a seriously tall building to “bounce” with little me inside. Yeah. Haven’t been a fan since.

No one likes to admit they enjoy elevator music, right? I mean, it’s practically a universal rule that you make fun of people who like the stuff. *points finger at self and chuckles* The worst part (oh, there is one, believe me)? If I’m forced to ride within a death box on cables, I find my only solace is in the music…which means I start to hum (dead giveaway)…and that inevitably leads to whisper-singing or, worse yet, full-blown karaoke (just slap my forehead with a giant ‘L’ for loser because I have outed myself as an elevator-music-loving loser).

So. Yeah.  My brain is running on random today. I’ll probably regret admitting to this tomorrow.

*CLOSED* GIVEAWAY Time, Holly Hootenanny-style!

 

UPDATE: This giveaway has now closed. The winner has been contacted and will have 48 hrs. to respond, otherwise a new winner will be selected.

 

Please keep an eye out for more Holidaze Hammock giveaway events coming in the future! 

 

*MANY HUGS to all who entered the giveaway--I wish I could send everything to ALL of you (not even joking). Happy Holidays to all of you sweethearts!*

 

It’s time for Holidaze Hammock’s first giveaway! Since this whole idea is based on the classic Bing Crosby film, Holiday Inn, it seems only right that our first Holly Hootenanny Giveaway be chock full of good, old-fashioned holiday fun!

Nearly everything is handcrafted and all ready to bring a little extra cheer to your holiday celebrations!

OMG, I feel like Santa…I need cookies. But not milk…it does wicked stuff to my stomach.

Okay, so enough of me babbling (it’s a nervous habit). Let’s get to the STUFF, right?!

Here’s everything you’ll be getting!

Now to break it down like Santa’s Naughty & Nice list:

1. BELIEVE sign shelf-sitter. This is made out of wood and has been painted. My believing-self just couldn’t pass this one up! SO cute and pretty big, too!

2. TWO wooden angel snowflake ornaments. These are also made out of wood and hand painted with the little angels. Aren’t they so sweet?!

3. FOUR felt ornament coasters and FOUR wooden, painted, & glittered tree-shaped napkin holders. *My mama spotted these. Such a cute touch!*

4. TWO tiny, wooden, painted penguin picture frames. You can hang these on the tree or set them on a mantle or bookcase.

5. “Wish List” notebook!!! Need I say more?

6. Old-fashioned, primitive journal. SO in love with this—from the old look to the brown-ish paper inside! It can be used as a journal, photo album, or even for scrap-booking!

7. Charlie Brown MUSICAL plush by Ty! OMG. Okay, I LOVE Charlie Brown SO much. When I was little, I used to pick out the most misfit-like tree, a la Charlie. No joke. To this day, I’ll pick something that’s flawed over something that’s perfect. Anyhoo, little Charlie plays the iconic Peanuts Gang theme…and, um, he’s in serious danger of being played to death, here…so, please, enter to win quickly. ;)

9. Hanging Snowman display card holder plush! *SQUEAL* LOVE HIM! He can hold so many things—Christmas cards, candy, notes to Santa (like he’ll ‘magically’ send them to the big man in red for you *wink, wink*), etc.

10. And, finally, Jeff Lange’s Holiday Treat 2012 DVD! Oh my gosh, his DVD's are SO much fun. Mr. Lange literally takes you on a tour of Walt Disney World at Christmastime. You’ll see their holiday fireworks show, Once Upon a Christmastime parade, castle lighting, and lots more, all without having to leave your comfy chair!

Now, the un-fun part…the rules (Terms & Conditions) for our Holly Hootenanny Giveaway:

1. To enter, just leave a comment on this post. Please make sure you leave your e-mail, so I can contact you if you win.

2. One entry per person.

3. Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

4. The Holly Hootenanny Giveaway will run from December 10th until December 13th, 11:59 est.

5. The winner will be selected by random.org and will receive an e-mail immediately following the drawing.

6. Winner will have 48 hours to respond, otherwise another winner will be selected (this is such a 'bah, humbug' one).

7. Open to U.S. residents only at this time. (More bah-humbug-ness. I hate the bah-humbugs). :(

**My opinions are my own and were not influenced by any kind of compensation (duh, I’m totally channeling Santa with all of this and he doesn’t get paid).

***NOTE: NONE of the prizes are recommended for children. Nearly everything is made for display/decoration only. Although I’m thinking Mr. Lange’s Holiday at Disney DVD should provide some fun family viewing. ;)

Holidaze Hammock Time!

Drawing by me.

Welcome to Holidaze Hammock!!!

I’ve been wandering around in the dark with social media for a while now. I really have been horribly awkward and uncomfortable with it all.

So, I sat back and said to myself, “Self, how can you make this experience as comfy and cuddly as your old recliner?” Yep, I have a Martin Crane-like recliner, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. I was listening to Christmas music at the time—it’s a year-round thing with me. While Bing sang White Christmas, I replied, “Well, if it could be like Christmas or Halloween, I’d totally be in the comfort zone.”

Like always, I had a talk with my mama, who simply said, “Baby girl, you need to feel the way you do when you write. You’re happiest when you write. Writing for you is like having that Christmassy feeling every single day.”

DING! DING! DING! (or jingle, jingle, jingle) The idea hit me like a giant candy cane.

I’m going to “open” my own version of Holiday Inn!

Holiday Inn is the classic Bing Crosby movie about a former big time crooner who just wanted a simple, yet fulfilling life. What does he do to accomplish exactly that? He opens Holiday Inn—a holiday-only retreat ready to welcome all those in need of the kind of magic only a holiday can conjure.

Just call me Santa…or the Great Pumpkin…or the Easter Bunny because I’m bringing y’all every bit of traditional holiday goodness I can find!

Every month featuring a major holiday—and some surprise ones—I’ll be putting together as much fun as Santa’s sleigh can carry.

We’re talking:

*Fun holiday themed posts

*And what would any holiday be without GIVEAWAYS?!

Down the road (Translation: when I become less clueless):

*Guest posts (Note: I SO hope for guest posts! As I get to know authors and bloggers, I’ll somehow gather the courage to ask them if they’d like to participate—for now, I reckon I need to prove myself to them before I can really approach anyone).

*LIVE online holiday parties, where it’s strictly BYOBB—Bring Your Own Blog & Book…meet, greet, and mingle.

*And more…

So, drop your worries, kick stress to the curb, and come on over to Holidaze Hammock!

First event: The Holidaze Hammock Holly Hootenanny—A Traditionally Fun Giveaway! Details and pictures to come!!!